The Instigatia Effect:Why Some Girls Can’t Stay Out of your Relationship.

So as a woman who also has their fans im sure yall do too so I wanted to put my writing skilladry to work and write thus blog post about how I honestly see it well from personal experiences with women who feel like they need to compete to get what you have or also those women that dated your boyfriend before you type the insecure, jealous ones. Ect ect so read my post about them lurking girls who Wanna be you or to compete with you the obsession of wanting what you have or who you are The Instigatia Effect... Why Some Girls Can’t Stay Out of Ur Relationship U know the type. The moment ur in a happy, solid relationship, suddenly there’s a wave of girls lurking, sliding into DMs, watching ur every movetrying way too hard to insert themselves into something that doesn’t involve them. They don’t want ur man. They don’t want u gone. They just want control. Welcome to The Instigatia Effectwhen certain women thrive on disrupting relationships, driven by jealousy, insecurity, and the need for validation. Why Do They Do This? Jealousy Masquerading as Curiosity Some girls can’t help but check in on their ex’s new relationship or even on women they envy because deep down, they want to compare. “Is she prettier? Happier? What makes her special?” It’s not about genuine interest it’s a disguised attempt to reassure themselves. The Ego Game For some, chasing taken men isn’t about love it’s about power. It’s the thrill of proving they can get attention from someone who’s already committed. Not because they actually want him, but because they want the ego boost of knowing they “could.” Social Status & Validation Ur relationship especially if it’s healthy, happy, and solid becomes something they want to test. It’s almost like a weird social experiment... “Can I steal his attention? Can I get in her head?” It’s not romantic. It’s just pure Instigatia nonsense. Manipulation & Control Some exes and even random women don’t want ur boyfriend fully moving on. They don’t actually want him, but they don’t want him free either. That’s why they keep tabs, pop up unexpectedly, or reach out randomly it’s not love, it’s control. When This Happens What Do U Do? First, breathe because Instigatia behavior isn’t ur fault. These girls aren’t coming for u because of anything wrong with they’re acting out because of what’s amazing about u. Stay Unbothered Effortless confidence kills Instigatia interference. They want a reaction, they want u frustrated, they want u questioning ur relationship. The more u stay calm, the less power they hold. Set the Standard With Ur Partner Ur boyfriend can’t control who messages himbut he can control how he reacts. If this keeps happening, make it clear... • Ignoring is the best move. • No engaging, no entertaining, no unnecessary energy given. • If it becomes a pattern, shut it down outright. A solid partner recognizes Instigatia nonsense and refuses to play into it. Protect Ur Peace It’s easy to get caught in the frustration of “why can’t people just let me live?” But here’s the truth... women who thrive on Instigatia behavior will never find true peace because their confidence is built on disrupting rather than genuinely flourishing. So while they lurk, interfere, and chase attention? U keep winning. My bad ass thought in the end and At the end of the day, Instigatia interference isn’t about u its about them. They’re reaching because they lack something. They’re lurking because they feel inadequate. They’re testing because they don’t know their own worth. Best thi g to do is say keep looking lady your only hurting your own self and ruining your own thought on ur self having to compare the differences between u and i well that’s something no one will ever win because we are all different and special in our own way you could never be me nor I you just keep moving on rather than breaking ur own self in the process bottom line The best thing u can do is .. Know urs. Own it. And never, ever let their nonsense shake what u had built. Because bad ass boss babes don’t lose sleep over peasants playing power games.